Speaking Truth.

What does it look like to start to speak truth to yourself, and cast your worries on Him? How do we focus on each day, looking for the gospel in everything?

I’ve been trying (with some success, I think) to speak more truth and life into myself. To let myself realize that I am enough, because I am a child of God. To allow that hope and love spread into the deepest parts of myself. One verse has stuck with me for years, and it surrounds a battle that I have fought my whole life.

Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.” -Matthew 6:34

So what is it supposed to look like, taking worries one day at a time? I suppose it’s something we reach but can never attain — the freedom of the day’s blunders and yet the amount of focus it takes to remain in the moment.

Maybe it’s a magical thing, but more likely it’s as simple as as your decisions.

For me, it’s been deciding what I only need to worry about today, deciding what I can get done, deciding when I need a break, deciding when I’ve done enough. Only then do I feel full — when I let go of most things I stuff myself with.

I’m not here to tell you exactly how to run your day, or even that my days run exactly to plan. I’m only suggesting that the kinder we speak to ourselves, the better our days will be, no matter how much we seem to accomplish. I’ve never been able to speak truth to myself alone, and depending on myself at this point would be ridiculous. But with the truth of the gospel I can pour into myself love and hope, instead of hate and disgust.

The more I keep myself immersed in the gospel, the more I will sing for joy because of the work he has done in my life. I want to run towards his love instead of away from it: into His arms and letting him hold my heart.

I read in Colossians last night about how God holds everything together. It says, He is before all things, and in him all things hold together.” (Colossians 1:17) This is my truth. This is my peace. These are the words that enable me to lose control of my life and realize that he is truly holding my life.

I’m not entirely sure what the next posts hold, or even if this post made any sense — but I do know that this is a lesson I am just now beginning to learn again. I hope to bring some light in my journey through my struggle of anxiety and control, as I know there are others working through this too.