The Truth About Asking God to Help You Grow

 Here’s my story about what happens when start asking God to help you grow in your life. I hope you find the encouragement and strength you need to grow into what He wants you to be!

Asking God to Help You Grow

(Side note: this is about the LONGEST blog post I have ever written. It’s absolutely insane- but I hope that this story will be able to help you in some way!)

January 1st, 2016, 12:01 am.

A quiet, silent prayer.

A prayer for the upcoming year.

“Hey God? I’d like to make a request for this year. I want to learn…a lot. I want this year to be the best year I’ve had yet, and I want to become closer to you than I’ve ever been. Even if this year is the hardest year I’ve had, I know you will make it for my good. I want to change. I want to grow. Make it happen in your way, God.”

I know that some of you might be thinking, “Man, Maddie. That’s a risky prayer, God is DEFINITELY going to follow through on that one. You sure you’re up for what he’s got?”

Yeah, I realize that. When I prayed that prayer, I knew it was ‘risky’. But I also knew that I would be seeing him in all kinds of areas in my life this year, and I was excited.

But I was totally unprepared for what was going to happen in the upcoming months.

Like the building of the setting of a short story, I started into my second year of track. Everything was going as I thought it should, and I had made a couple new friends. As all runners do at some point, I fell into a state of extreme competitive-ness (is that a word?) and was very anxious to keep my title as fastest miler in our school. Now, I would admit that I usually don’t care about that sort of thing, but I was putting a lot of pressure on myself then. As you may have read, my post on confidence talks more about this.

And like all stories, this problem increased into a climax. I’d have to say that happened in the middle/end of the summer.

I don’t want to say that I fell into a depression-because that sounds very sad and disheartening. But, that’s pretty much what happened. Honestly, I had been running for about 2 years and loved it, but every run during that summer made me more and more discouraged. It was hot, slow, and dreadful. Why was I doing this? What was the point? Where did my love for this sport go?

I remember one day, after a very hot run with a couple other people, I came home and cried harder than i had in a long time. Things just didn’t make sense- I felt so lost. Without running, I felt like I wasn’t even myself anymore. When the ability to be “good enough” was taken away from me, I felt hopeless.

Now. As an outsider reading this, you’re probably wondering how a Christian like me could get soooooo wrapped up in what was happening and what others thought. But, it happened. And I am fortunate to have gone through this. 

But before I explain why I was so fortunate, let me continue. (Because yes, it got worse.)

Cross country season started, and needless to say I was less than ready for it to begin. A few of my good friends and one of my coaches were leaving the team, and things just didn’t seem quite right. After the first meet, I realized how frustrated I was at my performance. Coming from an almost sub-6 minute mile to a 5k in 24 minutes just doesn’t happen. (Okay, I guess it does happen- because it happened to me.) My legs felt locked; my mind felt numb. I was going through the motions, and my fear of the hurt was more than my exhilaration of the run itself. But, as hard as it was, I told myself my goal was to help others that season, which is what I tried to do. One of my friends was hurting in times and in her health even more than I was. Another had some depression she was dealing with. Focusing on them seemed to help. But I was still bitter and frustrated at myself and others, because I felt I wasn’t good enough. (Yeah, I know. Super prideful. Don’t judge.)

At some point during the season, our family took a trip to Maine. With the cooler weather and a relaxing week, I was able to run 3 miles in under 23 minutes. And I was ecstatic!! I thought, “finally. My times are getting faster, things are starting to fall into place.”

But when I got home, wonder of all wonders, my times slowed down again. And this time, I was angry. So angry about it that I had a hard time being cheerful around my teammates(usually an easy thing to do for me), and I may have had a few bouts of crying in the school bathroom. Yippee.

Okay, so keep in mind I am not the type to tell others about these things, so while I should have talked to my coaches about it a little more, I didn’t. I tried, but I couldn’t.

Fortunately for me, one of my friends decided that if I wasn’t going to talk to the coaches about how frustrated I was, she was going to help me out. One morning, received a text that went something like this:

“Good evening…just wanted to take a moment and say thank you for being such a great spiritual leader on this team. I know your fighting some doubt and dealing with frustrations in your times. Persistence pays off and your rewards are coming. I have a feeling your times are going to be dropping soon and we have to truly believe that. You’ve put in a lot of work and I only want to see what’s best for you. Keep being the spiritual leader and don’t forget to follow your own advice.”

Okay…yeah… when I read that that morning, I’ll admit it- I was crying so hard. Because I wasn’t expecting it, because it was just what I needed, because God puts things in our path at exactly the right time.

Now, things didn’t get instantly easier. (But do they ever??)

I had a new coach that came alongside our head coach, and while he was great he was really, really crazy. It was hard to watch him fall in love with running when I could barely coax myself to do a few miles. But, it turned out that’s exactly what I needed, what we all needed. The pep talks, the speeches on mental toughness, getting encouraging verses in my inbox- It was all necessary.

Okay, I’m starting to get too nostalgic here. (Do you get nostalgic over something that happened 5 months ago?? I’m not sure)

The point is, I was fortunate to have these problems. I was fortunate to deal with all of that. I am completely blessed because I know that God answered my prayer. He made 2016 hard, but he made me closer to him. He was able to make me grow in ways I could never have imagined. I am blessed because I can now say I’ve climbed over that mountain. Okay, but let’s be honest–He carried me over that mountain.

And I am forever blessed because of that, too.

Also, guess what?

I prayed that same prayer in the beginning of 2017, as well.

As my coach always says, “Praying that you want to grow is always a risky prayer, so be prepared. God will for sure answer it- and it’ll be good.”

So hey. Here’s the thing. Your 2017 may not be going too great. But that’s because, regardless of whether or not you pray to God asking for you to grow, he’s gonna help you grow. And his plan is sometimes not our plan, but it’s always a good one. Hard, sure, but good. So why not pray and ask for God to help you grow? Yes, I know it’s March and it may be late for a New Year’s resolution, but it’s never too late for God.

What do you think about asking God to help you grow?